A short one today as I share the thought
process in and around a mid-life crisis of sorts…
We’re at that time again… a mythical time
of wonder and hope that seems to occur every few months or so with somewhat
depressing regularity.
Events are on the horizon (hmm not sure I
have booked any accommodation yet… dammit!) and on a drizzly (well, this is
London, so its randomly sunny now, but still, it was drizzling when I started)
Wednesday morning with masses of tedious work to do (but the boss safely away
in Houston for the week) the brain is drawn to the Next Army Challenge. The
fact that there is no way any new army chosen could possibly be completed in
time for the events that sparked off the thought process is completely beside
the point.
There is a deeper motivation at work here
too – I have mentioned before my fear of the burn out associated with over
exposure to one army for literally years at a time. My aim has always been to
have three tournament-ready armies so that I could switch them around depending
on comp, general gut feel and whatever other excuse I come up with at the time.
Alas, this is not something I have succeeded with. Sure, I have my Lizards, but
the painted (if we are being kind enough to call it that, and as I am writing I
don’t really feel like picking on myself just now, so we will go with it) VC I
do have are very limited in build. I have bought a beautifully converted VC
army with almost all the options… but I just can’t bring myself to paint it. I
really think I need an airbrush – it’s the base coating that utterly defeats me
every time! This always happens to me. I have an Empire and a Beastmen army
waiting to be painted, but this basic step keeps getting to me. Heck, I gave
away a Skaven army for this very reason. But I digress (regular readers will be
shocked)…
I have borrowed, at various times, a WoC
army, a Beastmen army and (under their old books) Dark Elves and Daemons. All
painted and ready to rock. None of these did enough to grab me.
The Quartermaster app on my phone is full
of endless lists for almost every race, trying to find the thing that an unforgivable
TV show would call the ‘X Factor’.
I was in the process of putting together an
order for Wood Elves with Element games (you may have heard of them, and the
very eagle eyed amongst you may even have spotted a way to get to their website
from this very page) when I stopped. I have played some 6 games with Wood Elves
under the new book, and have been enjoying them (I’ll write about them in more
depth next time). However, are they the “right” army for me? An army I want to
invest a couple of hundred pounds on, commit to base coating [shudder], take to
events and become part of (the probably relatively short lived) bandwagon?
No, this decision was going to involve
serious thought. I can think of many reasons for not doing any single army, but
then I have quirky views on what I want from the army and the game. No. I am going to solve this problem with
cold, hard logic.
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| Logic Bomb |
A lot of people scoff at the “fluff” of the
game, and a lot of very good players know literally nothing about it other than
general themes. That’s completely ok. For me though, the Tolkienian aspects of
the Warhammer World plays a big role (well, that and the social side of
things). Being rather boring and not into either hard Rock or Metal (though I
appreciate you can’t kill it) music, I have always preferred the good guys in
the grand scheme of things. Now this is a generalisation of epic proportions –
I, for example, like Vampires a lot, but this (ahem) scientific study is
looking big picture, so let’s move on.
For those who don’t know, the armies of the
Warhammer World are broken down thusly:
Forces of Order: High Elves, Lizardmen, Empire,
Dwarfs, Bretonnians, Wood Elves (though I personally think these should be
neutral)
Forces of Destruction: Warriors of Chaos, Daemons, Beastmen, Dark
Elves, Skaven, Vampire Counts, Orcs & Goblins, Chaos Dwarfs*
Neutral: Tomb Kings, Ogre
Kingdoms
*not a real army
The written word aside, obviously the
general look of an army is of extreme importance – for people that actually
like painting it may even be *the* most important thing. There are two
aspects here – individuals models, and the general army aesthetics, and how you
rare these is a deeply personal thing. For me it breaks down as follows:
Like: High
Elves, Lizardmen, Wood Elves, Bretonnians, Vampire Counts, Orcs & Goblins
*meh*: Dwarfs, Dark
Elves, Beastmen, Daemons
Dislike: Empire, WoC,
Chaos Dwarfs*, Tomb Kings, Ogre Kingdoms, Skaven
*not a real army.
Now, this is not to say there are not
aspects of each of the armies that I really like, but your gut feel of the
general look of an army is very important. They will, after all, require base
coating [gulp].
As primarily (solely?) a gamer at heart,
the way an army plays is extremely important. To throw yet another caveat out
there, obviously almost any army can be made to play in a different way to
their “norm” (if they even have one), but being all scientific-like, we are
assuming a somewhat median position in the behaviour of the various armies.
On a very basic level one the easiest
differentiators between armies is that of the horde vs the elite. In my opinion
the various armies can be divided thusly.
Slavering masses: Beastmen, Skaven, Vampire Counts,
Orcs & Goblins, Empire^, Tomb Kings, Lizardmen, Daemons^
Thin red line: High Elves, Dark Elves,
Wood Elves, Bretonnians, Dwarfs, Ogres, Warriors of Chaos, Daemons^, Empire^,
Chaos Dwarfs*
^Depends on build
*not a real army.
Whilst I have a strong theoretical
preference for the more elite armies, Vampires (and my skink-heavy Lizards) are
a classic example of how that perception of what I enjoy is not actually always
correct. Hate proving myself wrong.
I have previously decried what I consider
the ever rising tide of the defensive armies out there, the pervasiveness of
the avoidance MSU armies, and the perverse Dwarfenisation of the rest. Conserve
points, snipe your opponent’s points. This gets dull. Sure, any army can be
played in a different way, but as a starting point:
Offensive: Dark Elves^, High
Elves^, WoC, Bretonnians, Ogres, Vampire Counts^, Daemons of Chaos^, Beastmen
Defensive: Dark Elves^, High
Elves^, Empire, Dwarfs, Skaven, Orcs & Goblins, Chaos Dwarfs*, Tomb Kings,
Lizardmen, Daemons of Chaos^
^Depends on build
*not a real army.
I was discussing with some friends recently
the possibility of doing Tomb Kings. There is a LOT I like about that book, and
I spent a lot of time working on some lists. But this whole endeavour came
crashing down around me when Craig made the very simple statement “I
occasionally get interested in TK, then remember that they don’t move much...”.
And he’s right. They can be made to move, and their threat range is actually
decent, but on a fundamental level, this is a static army. Mobile armies are
(in my opinion at least) simply more fun. What do I mean by mobile? Well, the
most important in some ways is sideways movement, the ability to redeploy and
counter enemy movement on the fly. Then there is also the basic top speed
sticker price of an army – can it get across the table, fast?
A leaf on the wind: High Elves, Dark Elves, Wood Elves (though less than before), Lizardmen,
Chaos Warriors, Daemons^, Bretonnians
Turtle Power: Empire, Dwarfs, Beastmen,
Skaven, Vampire Counts, Orcs & Goblins, Daemons^, Chaos Dwarfs*, Tomb
Kings, Ogre Kingdoms (come to think of it
these are actually pretty fast)
^Depends on build
*not a real army
“Herohammer” is a term used by us old
timers to remember a now-distant past when Warhammer really was about the
characters (ok, arguably for some it still is), and it is either remembered
fondly or with disgust. Personally I miss my Chaos Lord with 10 ASF attacks
that ignored armour and any wound inflicted caused instant death, whilst also
being immune to any magic weapons, whilst his mate the BSB (not quite touching
his base) negated any and all magic items an opponent had (and I think made my
unit immune to spells)… but that’s just me. I like combat characters that do
things, that create stories that you remember years later. What armies
naturally lend themselves to character beat sticks?
There can be only one: High Elves, Dark Elves, Lizardmen,
Bretonnians, Warriors of Chaos, Daemons^, Dwarfs, Beastmen, Vampire Counts,
Ogre Kingdoms
Power to the people: Wood Elves, Daemons^, Empire, Skaven (Verminlord notwithstanding), Orcs &
Goblins, Chaos Dwarfs*, Tomb Kings
^Depends on build
*not a real army
Magic, as no Dwarf player the world over
has ever fully appreciated, is fun. Being able to dominate magic phases is a
brutal ability. To do this you need access to effective magic, with high impact
spells, ideally generating extra power dice and an army that lets you make the
most of this. That being said, it’s a fickle mistress, and investing a lot in
it a recipe for disaster. Interestingly, most armies at the moment seem to put
a big reliance on magic, the point where it becomes a crutch.
Wind surfers: High Elves, Dark Elves, Wood
Elves, Lizardmen, Warriors of Chaos, Daemons^, Beastmen, Skaven, Vampire
Counts, Orcs & Goblins, Chaos Dwarfs*, Tomb Kings, Empire
Magic… meh: Dwarfs, Bretonnians, Ogre
Kingdoms, Daemons^
^Depends on build
*not a real army
Something of particular importance for a
strong long term relationship with an army is the flexibility on builds. Having
an army you like but can only make one list type with is very limiting
(something I have found to a limited extent with my Lizardmen). The key here is twofold. Effective core units
that fulfil different functions are the perfect way to start this, as it can
change the entire direction of the builds. Following this, different, viable
special units that undertake markedly different roles are the hallmarks of
flexible army potential. With this in mind, how do the armies square up on this
front?
Play-doh: High
Elves, Dark Elves, Daemons, Warriors of Chaos, Empire, Vampire Counts
Old chewing gum: Ogre Kingdoms, Bretonnians,
Lizardmen, Dwarfs, Wood Elves, Chaos Dwarfs*, Orcs & Goblins, Beastmen,
Skaven, Tomb Kings
*not a real army
Maybe it’s because I live in leafy South
West London, maybe it’s because I work in the West End, or perhaps simply
because I am too kool for school (or, failing that… a stubborn old git), I am
never happy doing an army that everyone else seems to be doing too. It makes me
grumpy(er). There is no way of really knowing what are the most popular events,
but having a quick look at those at SCGT and Call to War, with a sprinkling of
observation and gut feel and we are left with:
Popular for a reason: High Elves, Dark Elves, Daemons, Empire,
Warriors of Chaos
Unwashed middle: Ogre Kingdoms, Vampire Counts,
Lizardmen, Dwarfs, Wood Elves (at a guess)
Hipster’s choice: Beastmen, Bretonnians, Skaven,
Orcs & Goblins, Tomb Kings, Chaos Dwarfs
*not a real army
In much the same way, no one wants to be
yet another person doing well with a powerful book. Firstly, there is less
satisfaction in that, quite simply. Sure, there is something in being the BEST
with a book lots of people are taking, but really, it’s far better to do well
with a medium book. Obviously you don’t necessarily want to go for one of the
weakest books out there, but avoiding the power armies is good for the soul.
Goliath: High
Elves, Dark Elves, Warriors of Chaos, Daemons, Ogre Kingdoms, Empire
Random Chap: Orcs & Goblins, Vampire
Counts, Lizardmen, Chaos Dwarfs*
David: Tomb Kings,
Bretonnians, Beastmen
*not a real army
Finally, a “nice to have” in my opinion, is
the potential that something will likely change in the not too distant future.
Being a commitment phobe (don’t tell my
wife) I don’t like the idea of embarking on a new army for one of the newly
released books, knowing there is every chance that there is a decade or more to
wait before a new book comes out.
8th Edition Book: Orcs & Goblins, Tomb Kings,
Ogre Kingdoms, Vampire Counts, Empire, Warriors of Chaos, Daemons, High Elves,
Dark Elves, Dwarfs, Wood Elves
Awaiting New Book: Bretonnians, Skaven, Beastmen, Chaos
Dwarfs*
*not a real army
So… what does that tell us (other than
writing ‘High Elves’ a lot gets tedious)?
It’s time to unleash the science (also
known as slightly dubious math, as our colonial friends inexplicably like to
say). Obviously not all categories were created equal, the look, style, mind-set
and flexibility of an army meaning far more to me than if there is a new book
on the horizon. For the purposes of this exercise, armies that straddled
boundaries got half points, for no other reason than that seemed appropriate.
When in doubt, throw stuff in a spreadsheet
and see what comes out, right?
Time to see what army I am going to do
next!
Well… ok. I can get with this. At least it’d
elves…
I have often considered doing a Bretonnian
army, liking everything about them save their build flexibility.
At least that’s settled. After writing nonsense
for 5 pages I can hardly not follow through now can I?
Time for the playtesting to begin (that,
and learn how to spell “Bretonnian”…)!
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| I thought they were meant to have horses... |
Until next time!
Raf
